Bdsm can be overwhelming.
Especially BDSM for beginners.
I have hand-picked three easy to implement BDSM activity which can be smuggled into your everyday ‘vanilla sex’ life without the major investment into BDSM gears or complex BDSM knowledge. These games are easy to start with. You might even practice already some of them, without knowing that’s actually considered soft-core BDSM activity.
Let’s dive in.
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We live in a world where we constantly need to wear masks to be ‘good enough’ for our friends, family and workplace. By the end, we forget who we are and what we need sexually to be complete. BDSM and exploring your kinky side could help you understand, open up and bring up these suppressed and ignored emotions, sexual needs, which could lead you to understand and accept yourself by the core. Pain also could be the pleasure source for some. When reading and learning about BDSM, it’s important to keep an open and non-judgmental mind at all times.
3 BDSM practice for beginners
1: Tie and Tease
It’s a light form of BDSM sex. Ideal for newbies. You can give it a try without any particular setup or equipment. It’s a practice of one tying up the hands, legs or the whole body. It can be performed on the bed, tied up to the door or using restrainers.
Tie your hands behind your back. Use a few tie and attach those hands to the bed. The one who does the tease would be the Dominant ( active person who is in control) and whom the bondage will be performed will be the passive or Submissive in this play. The dominant will tease the partner to a point where they get so excited that they could have an orgasm.
[bctt tweet=”Tease could happen by using feather, silk, wax or simply by touching. ” username=”alexandra_guru”]
The tied partner is usually stimulated repeatedly without relief. By carefully varying the intensity of stimulation, the passive partner is held in this highly-aroused state near orgasm. The tied partner’s urge to orgasm can become overwhelming.
If the tied partner is allowed to climax it may be stronger than usual due to the increased tension and arousal that builds up during the extended stimulation. The tied partner may also instead be denied orgasm or be given a ruined orgasm in which case they will feel strong feelings of sexual frustration.
Extra tip
Use Blindfold
Advance tip
Use a mouth gag or/and some sex toys on the submissive during the scene to increase sensations.
2: Spanking
Spanking can also be performed without no equipment, just by using your palms.
If you liked the test-drive with the hands, you could always get a paddle, wooden stick, crop, but my experience hands would do just fine.
Give a good spacing and discipline!
How to do it:
You can bend over to your partner’s lap. It’s extremely stimulating while you are spanking to have nasty dirty things said to you. Example: “You have been a naughty, dirty little girl/boy. You deserve to be punished. At this point, you should spank the buttock. Starting light intensity and as the sexual tension grows to bring more power into your hits too.
Bonus Tip: You can play a school-girl/boy-teacher scene here.
The teacher can drop the chalk down to the floor. Demanding the schoolgirl to pick it up, who refuse this. It will generate the punishment. Be creative and improvise. Keep talking and let your imagination fly so the fun could be greater during the play.If you are new to spanking, always ask your partner, if she/he is okay with the strength and the way of spanking. It’s super important to playing safe and doing things that will bring pleasure to both.
3: Facesitting
This is one of my favourite BDSM activity. You can perform it together with a sensual tie and tease. Tie your man up to the bed. Rub your body against his. Stimulate his erogenic zones. Stroke his genitals, tease him with words and gentle touches around the body. Standing on top of him ( very empowering feeling, ladies!) spread your legs wide across in front of his face. Show him your panties under that short mini-skirt.
Make him want to pull that tiny pantie away to see and taste your lotus flower. Be sensual, seduce and play with him. It’s your time to be in control. Let me know if he is going to be a good boy, but only then he might taste your juices.
Keep eye-contact when talking down to him. Show him that you are a strong, confident, sexy women who knows what she wants. Man would go crazy from this. As in their nature to be dominant, powerful and now they all tied up in your hand.
Slowly squat down to your man’s mouth. Tease him more by touching rubbing your clit through your panties. Ask them: if he wants to lick or eat your pussy out? (Always use language you feel comfortable with!) Be sure at this point they are ready to beg to taste you. You decided how long you will keep teasing him. Once you feel willing to give in and let him taste your juices. Remove your panties, or just you can just sit on his face still wearing your panties. I would do the second option to arouse more the sexual tension and desire. Demand him to smell your pussy, but tell him straight if he still can’t taste it. You can order him to inhale your smell.
Slide your panties away and let him taste your pussy. Be confident. You are in charge. You are a goddess.
A goddess who deserve to be nurtured loved and worshipped.
You set the rhythm, time and intensity of this play.
Have fun and let him eat your pussy like a hot cake until you are satisfied and ready to move to the next step.
Want to raise the bar?
Add some breath control play into the face-sitting
Sit on your partner’s face, covering up all face, including the nose too. Count to 10 and release. Breath control if done correctly could be a euphoric sensation for man while licking pussy. ***
***( For more advanced pussy eaters sit on it until he starts struggles under you!)
Conclusion
You can hear a thousand times about something how amazing it is unless you try, you will never know. Take a deep breath and dive in the dark side of pleasure. Leave your judgement and fears away.
Hope this article helped you to open your BDSM sex toolset and courage to give it a try!?
Let me know if you do! I would love hearing about all it! Comment below, what BDSM scene you fantasise about!